It’s funny how one word can invoke different meanings for different people. If you asked me to describe myself I would say, funny, cute, loyal, or even free-spirited but the word “sexy” would never cross my mind. Sure, I see myself as a lot of things, but I’ve never seen myself in that light.
In recent years my views about my body have greatly improved. I can honestly say that I love who I am. However, this word still makes me feel uncomfortable and uneasy. After my husband made a remark about how sexy I looked, instead of relishing in the comment, I felt embarrassed and a little self-conscious.
But why did I feel this way? Was it the word. or my own perception of the word that I had a problem with?
Normally, when I hear the word “sexy,” I think of someone who is overtly flaunting their body for attention. Growing up in a very religious home, sexuality was not something that was openly discussed or even encouraged. Instead of developing a healthy understanding of my body and my sexuality, I was taught to be afraid of expressing that part of myself.
I also learned to fear interactions with opposite sex and saw it as negative. Even as I started dating in college and establishing my own beliefs about sex and sexuality, I continued to struggle with the beliefs that I had been taught as a child.
In order to change my perception of what sexy is and what it means to me, I decided to look at the definition of the word. According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary, sexy is defined as “sexually appealing, attractive or exciting,” but it can also refer to someone that has “interesting or appealing qualities.” So today, when I think of the word sexy, I think of the qualities that I find attractive or appealing.
The definition of sexy is different for everyone. For me, being sexy is being comfortable in my own skin, embracing life, being down to earth, and caring about others. It also refers to the way I feel when I take care of my mind and body by being healthy and active.
But most importantly, being sexy is the ability to look at myself in the mirror and love what I see.
What does sexy mean to you? Share your personal definition in the comments!
Jackie is an Ohio native who recently moved to Monterey, California. A former Spanish teacher, Jackie is now pursuing her dream of working in television. When she’s not blogging or writing, she loves to travel with her husband, work out, spend time with their three dogs, and soak up as much sunshine as possible. Jackie is happiest when she is being active. To follow her natural hair journey and other adventures, check out her blog. Got a question for Jackie? Write to firstname.lastname@example.org.